Other thoughts

More like guidelines

Rules but less strict.
Screenshot showing a lot of ships emerging from fog.
Source

I’ve been touring personal websites as part of my ongoing website update. I noticed that I particularly enjoy coming across pages where people talk about beliefs they live by. Some call them personal philosophies, others call them principles, values, or rules.

Companies tend to have these kinds of pages, but I find personal ones interesting because they’re more specific and unique. They reveal something deeper about the individual than an “about” page which makes the person more relatable.

They’re also quite engaging. Reading someone else’s beliefs makes me reflect on my own. Do I agree with this? Why yes and why not? Why am I cringing at this particular one?

I’ve instinctively steered clear of holding myself to “lifelong” values (maybe this isn’t even a thing?). In my experience, it’s better to keep values and beliefs open to change. And it’s better to keep them detached from my identity which is much easier said than done.

To that end, I’m framing my own rules as more like guidelines — less strict, more open to interpretation. Rules bring structure but they’re also meant to be bent.

This isn’t an exhaustive list but I’ve referenced these enough that they feel like my own and not borrowed.

Give it your all, then sit back. It feels so much better walking away from the bigger things knowing that I’ve done everything I can, regardless of the outcome. And if I can’t give it my all, that’s a sign to walk away.

Be honest as much as possible. Both with myself and others. Sometimes it won’t be possible and that’s OK. But honesty opens more doors, and it won’t break or take anything that’s truly meant to be.

Intuition is also knowledge. Choosing logical reasoning over intuition is the safe option but not always the wisest. It takes more courage to trust an innate knowledge that no one else understands.

All feelings are valuable and need processing. This includes uncomfortable feelings. We’re often too quick to judge the “bad” ones or avoid them altogether, and that is not good. It’s not about never feeling down, it’s about feeling down but not staying there (for too long).

Don’t take yourself too seriously. I’ve struggled with this one for a long time (thanks to Asian upbringing). But unserious-ness is more conducive to a growth mindset and it makes living more fun. Always good to be able to laugh things off.